The Power of the Solo Date
This week started with Valentine’s Day, which means I’ve had love on my mind– most importantly, my favorite kind of love: SELF LOVE.
I often tell my Life Coaching clients, “Your relationship with yourself is your most important relationship of all.” In order to feel the whole spectrum of positive emotions towards someone else– joy, love, peace, independence, confidence, and more– you need to feel them towards yourself first.
Louise Hay, best-selling author and founder of the self-help movement, says, “Love is the great miracle cure. Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.”
There are many ways you can show yourself self-love, but today I want to share one of my personal favorite ways… the solo date.
A solo date is taking designated time to treat yourself in the same way you would someone you care about. It doesn’t have to be complicated or elaborate– simple is fine.
Last weekend I took myself on the most wonderful (and simple!) solo lunch date. I found a casual French bistro with a courtyard (pictured above). The weather was sunny and beautiful– I love San Diego in the winter– so I grabbed the novel I’ve been reading, ordered some French onion soup and a baguette sandwich, and found a shady table in the courtyard. I spent 2 hours there, not looking at my phone, not talking to anyone else, just enjoying my own company and engrossed in my thriller novel.
Leaving my solo date and getting back in my car, I felt… different somehow. I felt…
relaxed
at peace with myself
quietly confident
comfortable
This, my friends, is the power of the solo date. It isn’t some elaborate self-care scheme that needs advance planning. All you need is a couple of hours of time dedicated entirely to Y-O-U.
As a Life Coach who frequently takes herself on solo dates and encourages other women to do the same, here’s what I’ve found are the most powerful ways a solo date can improve your self-love:
Empowers you to select a location or activity (restaurant, museum, park, etc.) that is entirely something you truly want to do– no one else’s decision
Builds the quiet confidence that comes from spending time alone in public
Peace and relaxation– you’re not answering to your kids or spouse or anyone else– this is your time to spend how you want it
A break in your hectic schedule. Between work and personal responsibilities, a solo date offers you a chance to press pause. Your to-do list will still be there after your solo date.
With these feelings of empowerment, confidence, and independence, you’re truly taking time to show yourself some love. Not only does this make you feel better in general, but it also allows your “cup” to be full, so you can be at your best and fully love the other people in your life.
Use Valentine’s Week as an opportunity to take yourself on a date. See how powerful it feels to prioritize YOU.
